Undesignated Gangs

The whole Japanese nation is shocked!
How is it possible that a gang of ten masked men can enter a club in a tony part of Tokyo and bludgeon a man to death with pipes and baseball bats.
There are obvious questions: who were they, why did they single out that one man, and how come they didn't kill 37 innocent bystanders in a spray of automatic weapons fire like they would have in America?
The article explains that they were probably members of an "undesignated criminal organization".
Sometimes, we humor bloggers have to leave the comfort of our wine-and-cheese-and-wine passivity and take on a new role: Hard Hitting News Hound!
Yes, even yours truly has pushed the envelope with hard-hitting, in-depth investigations about the Yakuza (Japanese mafia) and how the police are taking them on. At great risk to myself and my... my........ hmmm....
ANYWAY!
At great risk, I have reported on how the dangerous Yakuza are in direct confrontation with the National Police Agency and also on how they are extending their tentacles into marriage, but despite these risks, I continue to point the spotlight of TRUTH on them.
The question that needs to be asked right here and right now is how could an undesignated criminal organization get away with this.
I needed to talk to the police, so I arranged an interview with my connection at the National Police Agency, Captain Kanarazu Taiho.

Hard Hitting News Hound (me): Thank you for agreeing to meet me, Captain Taiho.
CT: It's my pleasure. We here at the National Police Agency welcome the interest of the press in our efforts to control crime in this country. Did you know that we solve over 85% of the crimes committed in Japan? (he leans forward and looks at me with his eyebrows raised expectantly)
HHNH: That's truly amazing....
CT: Haven't I seen you before? (he lights up a cigarette) You don't mind if I smoke, right? I know you foreigners are sensitive to smoking.....
HHNH: Oh... no... it's OK. But yes, I did interview you before about the issue of "designated criminal organizations".
CT: I heard that you also talked to Lieutenant Wairo about our efforts to suppress gang activity (he raises his eyebrows again suggestively)?
HHNH: Yes, I did. A few months ago....
CT: Did he say anything about that soapland over in Meguro (a Tokyo district)?
HHNH: Er... he did give me a card for Charmy Bliss Soapland... is that the one?
CT: Oh.... no.... never mind. (he scribbles something onto a note pad) OK. What can I do for you Mr. Pterosaurish? Did you overstay your visa again?
HHNH: No, that is not what I want to talk to you about.
CT: Your alien registration is expired?
HHNH: No, not that. What I wanted to talk....
CT: Maybe, you have modified your car to be a little outside of the legally permissible parameters? You DO have those funny tubes on the front bumper....
HHNH: You know about those?.... No, what I wanted to talk to you about is the recent killing in the Flower Club in Roppongi, and how it was done by an "undesignated criminal gang".
CT: Ah... yes... the murder with the pipes and baseball bats. Can you believe it took them two minutes to kill him?
HHNH: Um... what?
CT: This is what I have been trying to convey to the media for ALL these many years (he shakes his head, removes his glasses and polishes them with his handkerchief). If we permit undesignated gangs to do this sort of thing, we are allowing incompetents to handle gang activity. This is beyond the pale. Two minutes? That is TOTALLY unreasonable. A registered gang would have done it in less than one minute for sure!
HHNH: I was wondering about that...
CT: Yes. I confess that I am a little anal about this issue. I really cannot believe that WE – here at the National Police Agency – would allow an UNdesignated criminal gang to kill someone in a club! That is simply OUTRAGEOUS (his spittle flecks my notepad)! Now, I have tried... over these many years... to make sure that ALL the gangs out there have every avenue to register with us. I asked for and received special funds... SPECIAL FUNDS I tell you... did you know that we are on a restricted budget now because of all the natural disasters and so on?... yes... but even so... I got SPECIAL funds to go out and canvass the gangs around the country and make sure that they are all registered so that we can complete the "designation process". But wouldn't you know it! (He tosses back his hair and snorts the cigarette smoke out of his nostrils) One gang simply refuses to register. What can I do about this? I ask you! What can I do?!!
HHNH: Er... arrest them?
CT: Are you completely out of your mind or just a usual foreigner? Are you kidding me? We can't arrest them. They are not registered yet! Let me make this clear to you (he raises his eyebrows again.... several times)... We only arrest members of designated gangs who have committed crimes which fall under the "designated criminal activity code" crimes. Running into a club in Roppongi and bludgeoning to death a patron in a club is one thing, but not registering in advance and becoming a designated criminal organization... I am telling you... this is too much. Our nation is going to seed here! I really have started to think that maybe I should emigrate somewhere... maybe America.
HHNH: You want to emigrate to America?
CT: No... I am sorry... it's too dangerous over there. But we really do need to make sure that all our criminal gangs are registered here.... do you have any ideas?
HHNH: Voter registration is a big issue in my country..... might you take advantage of some of those techniques?
CT: Voter registration, you say? What is that? Anyway... yes... we are interested in ANYway to get the criminal gangs to come in and become "designated gangs". Once we get them on board, we will be able to count on them to not take so long to bludgeon their victims... I mean.... 2 minutes? Hello?... and things will be much smoother.
HHNH: So registration is the main thing....?
CT: Absolutely! We simply cannot allow gangs to be unregistered. We must be able to designate them officially before they can conduct any sort of gangland activity.
And did you say the Charmy Bliss Soapland?
HHNH: What?... oh... Lieutenant Wairo's recommendation.... I am so sorry... I didn't actually go there.
CT: Foreigners (he rolls his eyes)! You need to get out and experience more of Japanese culture, you know. We had a civilization when you foreigners were still living in caves and trees.
HHNH: Yes... um... whatever... thank you for your time, Captain Taiho, I really appreciate it.
CT: Anytime, foreigner.